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** Get Bitchy **

At what point did I start to get soft? While the physical results are there, I am not talking about those. I am talking about the weakness of mind and spirit. While I may have been a bitch in high school - and perhaps, a little self-absorbed, I was also fearless. I did things without thinking too hard about it. I tried like I had nothing to lose and I would cry my eyes out and get back up before having time to even wipe them. Some of this resilience has stayed, but a strange form of tiredness has parked itself inside of me and said "how about lets not". Ive tried looking through the halls and rooms of my interior emotional house but this - lack of effort - is hiding quite deep within. I feel

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